The Light

At the end of the tunnel is starting to shine.

With regards to this - he asked me to be his sponsor. Initially, I had no clue what he was on about - but he's been to two GA meetings so far (2/2 weeks is good!). Apparently - he needs a sponsor. And the role of the sponsor is that whenever he feels the urge to gamble, he has to call me and I have to read some stuff out of this book that GA have given to him (and he will give to me).
This makes me smile. A lot. The fact that he's realised that it's not just about the money he's lost but the time, the missed opportunities, the disappointment of parents and so much more - I have faith in him.

The Best Things in Life are Free

Cost of helping lady with pram/buggy/pushchair (whatever you call it in your part of the world!) down the stairs at the underground station - Free.

Smile on my face as the toddler in the pram took his bottle out and went "bank you" - Absolutely priceless!

Bondage with Beds

It's amazing what people bond over isn't it?

Parents bond with their children. For mothers and daughters, it may be a shopping trip or over a cup of coffee (or tea - let's not forget that we are Sri Lankan!). For fathers and sons - a love of sports or maybe over some DIY. For friends, we bond over boys/girls/clothes/shoes/films/books/sex - with some friends there are no boundaries! With your respective other half - again - sometimes there are no boundaries.

With your siblings - as you get older, you bond over memories, alcohol, food and maybe similar stuff as with your friends (though maybe not the sex bit - some things are better left unsaid!).

With my siblings - we bonded yesterday over the construction of a bed. My brother is in the process of redecorating the room. He bought a metal bunk bed. I would try and explain it but I'd do such a rubbish job that I've provided the link.

So we decided to put it together yesterday. The three of us (with some bossing around from my dad!) following the instructions and all in all doing an alright job! We worked for about 4 hours (I'm sure it wouldn't have taken this long for a professional!), we didn't even think about dinner (big deal for us!), and we bonded. We laughed about memories of our childhood bunk bed and that in turn lead to other childhood memories. My brother has a knack of bringing up my incredulous moments of stupidity and then they both laugh at me! I think at one point we were laughing so hard that the structure of the bed nearly it's support from us! Not all of it was laughs and smiles though. Men in general are bossy and SL men even more so. My brother did get annoyed at the laughter sometimes - more so when it was at his expense (totally worth it nonetheless!).

And so to my siblings - for being there for me always, for helping me laugh at my stupidity, for helping me correct my mistakes, for keeping my secrets, for supporting me when I argue with appa, for helping me with household chores, for making fun of me when I cry at everything, for listening to go on about my crush(es), for lending me money and for so much more that is yet to come!

Thank you for allowing me to be me. I love you.


*Disclaimer* - I'm so sorry for the randomness of this post!

My Word(le) is My Honour

I like the second one better!

This was far too cool an opportunity for me to miss. I could do this all day! Thanks to Deane who started off the trend (I think!).

Why...

• Do (most) men never call when they say they will?
• Am I always hungry?
• Can't I be one of those people who can eat anything and everything and not put on any weight?
• Did I choose kickboxing?
• Do people try and push me off the bus before the doors have even opened?!
• Is my job so boring?
• Am I so poor?
• Am I still single?!
• Do I commit to things that I know that I'll not be able to follow through?
• Am I so L A M E?!

The above is just a quick vent of things that I am questioning at the moment!

Messy Threesomes

Basically I was propositioned to have a threesome with a couple who are both good friends of mine....... No, not really but I thought I'd ensnare you into reading what is most probably a mind numbing post!

I've just returned from Lanzarote with two of my girlfriends - B (best friend) and RL (very good friend). Now B and I go way back - we went to high school together and despite not being best friends (BF) (I feel like I'm in high school using that term but needs must!) at the time - we cemented our relationship as BF when we lived together during university. RL and I have known each other for about 8 years or so and she has become a good friend of mine. I don't tell her all my worldly secrets though (not like I tell you guys!) because she does have a habit of judging people.
Last time I went on holiday with RL and B (and 3 other boys), there was a lil' tension - and we only went away for 3 days! A lot of "I felt left out" feelings. So I wasn't looking forward to the trip so much.
Before we left RL mentioned to both B and I (only half-heartedly) that we shouldn't proclaim our BF-ness! Erm.. okie so we decided to become very conscious if were doing that.
Here you need to concentrate:

RL introduced me to A (male). A is my crush. A and I get along really well despite this (whether he knows or not). I introduced A to B and they also get along very well. When A, B and I are together - we have so much fun. RL and A are not as close as they once were - time, distance and change does not always bode well on friendships.

So obviously as girly holidays go - there's bound to be some deep and meaningfuls and a lot of talk of sex. One night, after a few drinks and revelations galore, everything was going really well. We came back from a night of clubbing and I was ready to sleep - B tells me that I care for A more than her and RL stirs the pot saying that I do spend a lot of time with him. I tell B not to be silly. That I love her and she comes before A. Always. RL says that she feels left out when A and I go out or do things together. Even more so when A, B and I do stuff! And so there were tears and tantrums and a completely bewildered Scrumpy! WTF just happened?! RL asking why I don't love her as much as B?! B asking why I don't love her as much as A?! All this at 5 in the morning! Clearly my mental capacity was unable to cope with this so I kinda went to sleep!

The following morning - our apartment was so silent. RL announced she was going for a walk. B was still asleep. So off went RL, B had a coughing fit so I checked she was OK. And then B apologised and told me how RL had been saying stuff when I was having a shower and stuff basically making her doubtful (Stirring like nobody's business!)!

The point of this is though - can you have a threesome of girls be good/best friends? How many of you are a threesome of best friends?

The moral of this: Never to go on holiday with RL again and clearly never tell anyone about when I'm seeing A!

Dealing with It

The title itself might give this post away as being a bit emotional and angst ridden. But I need advice. And in the real world (as opposed to the blogger world), I can't ask anyone without them asking all sorts of questions and prying much further than that which is actually required. Also, I'm very sorry about the length but please try and read it all the way through - I need all (and any of) the help I can get

I'm a very giving person - I give myself completely to those that mean the world to me. I do everything that is within my capability if it means I'm helping someone out. And most often than not, I usually can help out. But with this I can't. Yesterday I felt helpless as I sat and watched my friend hurt.

My friend has a problem. An addiction. To gambling. So much so that he lost over £2K in last two days. I haven't been friends with him long - though time is not an issue in defining great friendships. I knew he liked to have a little gamble. I mean, he even told me that he only had a certain allowance he gave himself and if he spent all of that, then that was that. Clearly it's a lot worse than I could ever dream about.

Despite us being good friends, we've never had the deep and meaningful moment where our friendship has been cemented. A lot of our conversations are jestful abuse (him to me) followed by a few heated political debates to the most mind numbing and random rubbish. When he called yesterday morning, I was mentally prepared for the abuse but somehow it never came. Instead he was brutally honest with me. There was something so raw about it that I welled up. What do you say to someone who has accepted that they have a problem? Something that you know nothing about; that you can't even begin to comprehend!

And so I gave him the best pep talk that I could. Told him that we would get through it. I found the number for Gamblers Anonymous and promised I would go to meetings if he was willing to try it. And this was all by mid day!

He called in the evening not ready to go home - do I want to chill? If you need me - I will be there. As a typical SL family, my parents are hardly likely to let me out no questions asked. But my amma has proved testament to the fact that she trusts me and supports me in everything I do (nearly!) and that she knew someone needed me and let me go.
"I don't know what time I'll be back amma."
"So long as it's not too late."

I meet him, punch him on the arm (remember I throw a mean kickboxing punch!) and buy him dinner. We sit in the car and I see an incredibly vulnerable person - so different from the obnoxious bully I'm so familiar with. We drive around. And it gets late - I would stay all night if I could but I know he has to go home. I drive him home and we drive past his house twice. Still not ready. We sit in the car on a parallel road as I struggle to find the words that will help him feel that everything will be alright. We can't prolong the inevitable and so he makes a move. Watching him walk to the door pains me. I have never seen him so dejected.

Silent tears fall all the way home.

I've confiscated his bank card in a bid that knowing he doesn't have it means he can't use it in the bookies but how do I help him cope with this?

Pon and Zi

A lil' showcase!

All pictures taken from http://www.ponandzi.com.

The Frequency Decreases....

Not the number of times I'm having sex - no (well, that too!).

Logging onto FB! Don't get me wrong - I'm an avid fan of FB. It's put me back in touch with a lot of people that I'd lost contact with. It's also put me in contact with people who I didn't really want to talk to once we'd left high school.

It's here that my ranting begins.

1. If I didn't talk to you in high school - I don't want to talk to you now. Please don't add me - I will reject you.
2. If we were friends at high school, but we lost touch and you can't see any pictures of me - it's because you're on Limited Profile (LP). If you keep bugging me about pictures, I will tell you that!
3. If I've only met you once/said one word to you, then the chances are I will not go home and search through our mutual friends to add you. Please try not to do the same. I won't be offended!

And by far the worst that I've seen:

4. People who I know that couldn't stand each other in the past/never spoke to each other are FB friends with each other! Why?

One of my friend's GF added me the other day. I ummed and ahhed about it for a whole day before rejecting her! I've never met her nor have I ever spoken to her. Just because I'm good friends with her BF doesn't mean we have to be friends! She wasn't impressed apparently - well tough shit!

A haphazard post done just before I leave work! Apologies for any spelling or grammatical errors as well as the randomness of it! :)