Friday 19 June 2009

The Same Record!

I am sick and tired of having to defend the Tamil Diaspora! Seriously! I am a member of the Tamil Diaspora so why are people tarring me with the same brush?! You don't know what my feelings are! Like by association is not acceptable (in my humble opinion) but what to do. Before I joined the gospel of all blogs Sri Lankan(!) - I was much more optimistic in my approach to the views of Tamils by the majority Sinhalese but reading some blogs, I wonder if maybe I was being too kind? But then how does that make me any different to them?! Good job then that I know that the views that I read are not of the majority of the population of SL but maybe that's (thankfully) due to my Tamil Diaspora mentality - being able to differentiate between opinions!

*rant over*

On a side note - as I was travelling on the underground the other day, the man sitting next to me (around 40 years old) took a camera out of his bag. Whilst pretending that he was "looking" through his photos, he discreetly took a photo of the woman who was sitting opposite him. Now this woman was not provocatively dressed, nor was she stunning - she was an attractive, moderately dressed woman aged about 26 ish.

My dilemma was if I should tell her. Quick text to A to ask for his opinion as I was coming up to my stop. "YES." comes the reply. So just as I was about to get off, I said to her that the man opposite her had taken a photo of her. She questioned him and he replied saying that he hadn't taken a photo of her but of the scenery behind her! Oh really?! Come on - as the tube is whizzing past, there's not much you might be able to get in to a photo AND I saw the picture - there's no scenery - just the woman.

Did I do the right thing? What are the laws (if any) about this? It's a bit worrying that this can happen and that most people just sit and not say anything to avoid confrontations!

And on a complete and utter side note I am meeting Pseudo tomorrow. S
O NER - take that the regular meet up people at open mic nights or in and around Colombo (you know who you are)!! Hater? Me?! Never! :-P

19 comments:

Gehan said...

creepy...!

ooh tell PR i said hi! :D have fun and post pics... :P yea i had to try.. lol...

Anonymous said...

i'm with gehan! pics!!! preferably "provocatively dressed"? ;) :D

and as for the rail-perv... I think you did a very good thing by telling the lady, because she definitely deserves to know!

Gehan said...

alrite i said nothing abt "provocatively dressed"... that is solely struggling-with-teenage-hormones aka Chavie's suggestion :P

Anonymous said...

hahaha... yea that was me! sorry! :D ;)

St. Fallen said...

I liked the rant (:

yes yes, post pics :P

as for the taking pics without permission
weeeelll sometimes a person could mean well and ask permission and be denied, which I can imagine happening to me alot, so I really wouldn't bother asking and just click anyway
if you don't want to be photographed then find a way to become invisible :P
if I can see you now, why can't I save that image? :D
whether they have a pic of you or not, if they think you're hot, they're inevitably going to wank off thinking about you... it's just that picture's help when ze memory is fuzzy :P :P :P

N B said...

You are equally guilty. How did you see the photo? Afterall he didn't show that to you. Did he? What if the lady was a criminal rogue and the guy was a CID guy investigating her case who had to follow her and take photos as evidence? You never know. There is always a possibility it could be for genuine purpose.

Now, why is it always "bad" when a guy takes a girl's photo? Come on... God made beautiful things to be admired. And some do want to keep that memory so they take photos. So whats the big deal here? And besides, you have no moral right to talk about this when you have sneaked in, been a first class GOSSIP and violated the photographer's privacy that is as good as anyone elses' privacy.

Now, what if he had actually taken the background in tube for a change? and not really this dumb woman who you try to defend? You saw it, but chances are you didn't see it properly coz you were a dirty rogue who was trying to look into what another dirty rogue was doing?

Sorry about my crudeness, but i can't stand this stupid "holier than thou" attitude of some seemingly righteous women who are nothing but silly.

As you have said, you saw. Now i ask again, how did you see if he didn't show you?

Hope i'm making sense :-)

Life is beautiful when EVERYONE minds their OWN BUSINESS. This EVERYONE includes ME as well. Sorry if you don't like my comment, but a candid opinion. I don't beleive in making politically correct statements !!!

Anonymous said...

Nibras, so if I were to take photos of your wife and daughters, go home, and post them on my blog, you'd be alright with that? Do you still think that it's fair that dude was snapping pics without asking the lady's permission?

Guys like you make me sick, hypocrisy at it's best!

N B said...

Anonymous,
I would be OK with it as long as it was not used for a wrong purpose. For the record, I DO take photos when i see beautiful things in life, this includes WOMEN as well. Sometimes i ask permission, sometimes i don't. But its just a personal thing i guess. I don't use it for a wrong cause. I just would come and show my wife and tell her "Hey see this hotie, she is more beautiful than you" :-)

My point is, why do we have to always SUSPECT? Can it not be for a harmless reason? One shouldn't arrive at CONCLUSIONS that easily. You should verify..... First and then act accordingly....

Here i end. No more comments from me on this. Thanks.

Scrumps said...

Gehan: Pictures?! Yeah - not today! :-P

Chavie: Lol - well maybe next time! And I thought so too!

St. Fallen: I needed to rant! :$ I agree - sometimes someone could mean well. And if you want to jerk off to a person, then sure a memory is enough BUT I don't think it's fair that just because you can - you should (the taking of photos that is - not the jerking off!).

NB: What if the guy was a stalker and 3 months down the line, the front page of the a newspaper was "Woman stalked, raped and murdered"?! Then I would have thought I might/should have done something different that could have changed the course of actions.

How have I been a gossip? I didn't go around telling anyone who the man was or where he was from or anything like that. In fact, I only told the woman in question. If you'd called me an interfering busybody then there may be some truth in that. I don't think it was that private as he blatanly could have done it more discreetly.

How do you know she was a dumb woman?! You're right though - he didn't show me the photo and I shouldn't have paid so much attention but he was sitting next to me and I caught a glance. The proximity of the seats on London Underground allowed me to do so. I'll pull Transport for London up on that. Maybe they can change the format of the seating layout on Underground Tubes for the future. Then everyone can do as they wish!

And I was going to ask what anonymous said but if someone took a photo of your wife and you saw - you'd be ok to just leave it at that? You wouldn't question it? You are a bigger person than I. I believe we should see the best in everyone until they prove otherwise. And this man was probably harmless. Maybe he was just appreciating something beautiful but he should have asked in my opinion - harmless or not.

I never claimed to be holier than thou - ever! And nor am I a righteous woman who is silly but you are entitled to your opinion Mr Bawa.

Would you rather I asked the man why he took that lady's photo first? I might try that next time Mr Bawa but don't count on it. If I am in the same situation again, I would probably do the same thing.

Anon: Thank you.

NB: And just because you might not use it for a wrong cause doesn't mean that everyone else is the same.

Dee said...

what you did in the train was right. I think a person taking a pic should always ask for permission. and lol on the NER. heyyy pseudo totally hid away when I suggested we meet up when she was down. Humpff...
N' I promise to always think twice when I go pro-ltter bashing. I guess a moderate person can easily be labeled that, just as easily I can be labeled a Sinhalese-chauvinist capable of genocide. *shrug
Anyway, hugs!

PseudoRandom said...

Legally, I think you're allowed to take a pic of anything as long as you're in a public space. If the subject of the photo asks you to delete the photo, you are supposed to comply. Now the tube isn't a public space - it's tfl property, and tfl allows non-flash still photography. So the dude wasn't breaking the law when taking the photo, but he would've been breaking the law if he refused to delete the photo, had the girl asked him to.

As for your role...yup you did the right thing. If he was genuinely taking a photo of the scenery (which would be pointless at that speed!), then he would have no problem proving it.

'Twas lovely to meet you!!! And I'll definitely be returning to that café! You need to make a trip this way soon :-)

@Chavie...you little thomian perv you :P
@DeeCee...that was like 6 months ago! I know you all much better now :D Next time I'm home, eh? ;-)

Anonymous said...

@Pseudo - whaaa? :P :D

and you honestly thought Dee was a serial killer 6 months ago, din't ya? :P :D

N B said...

I repeat, you did the WRONG thing. Yes, you should have gone about minding your own business. As you have been a POKY NOSE you lose all grounds coz you are equally guilty. Called you a GOSSIP and I repeat you have been a GOSSIP coz not only did you go about doing some social service, but you also talked about it online for the world to know. Yes, you didn't go about telling others, but you were smart. You posted it online. And for everyone to know. So what do i call you now? A social worker in london tubes?

As for "holier than thou" righteous woman, i came to that conclusion long ago having read every single post of yours though i never commented on any. May be i'm wrong. Yes, i don't know you. All i know is your blog and your blog DOES give me that impression. So don't blame me for that. Perhaps you should try put yourself in a reader's shoe before pressing that "publish now" key. It helps. Always does. Many may not say it to face coz this society is full of ass kissing sad souls. I'm not one of them. I say crude things in a crude way. Sorry...

As to whether i would be OK if a guy posted my wife's and kids photos online, I guess I would be OK as long as he didn't post it on a porn site. Honestly.... Its that simple for me. No fuss though i would be a little uncomfrtable, but i don't think i would go to the extent of preventing. Afterall when we walk on the street thousands of people see us, we don't say "I'm walking therefore you don't look at me" People see us everyday and its really no big deal if people saw us online. Yes, it does take some maturity to handle it this way. Besides, my wife is all over internet due to her profession as a journalist, so its no big deal really. Kids, i don't know, i guess thats OK too....

All i wanted to say was, you should just mind your business in public places. Less trouble that way. I wouldn't re-act even if i knew the person seated on my left was taking his gun to shoot the person on my right. I wouldn't care even if there was a murder. I just would mind my business, that is TRAVEL and not SOCIAL SERVICE !!!

BTW, please feel free to call me NB or Nibras. No need Mr and all that. I guess, i'm too small to be given that respect. Thanks for posting my comments. Atleast you have that maturity and tolerance.

I may not agree with many things you say, but RESPECT, I would still be reading your posts...... And comment when i'm irritated enough :-)

Scrumps said...

NB: One last comment - I don't have to put myself in the reader's shoes. I am not forcing anyone to read this blog. It's there for me to publish what I feel.

And if my blog posts infer that I am a "holier than though" self righteous woman - then so be it.

Because I didn't do what you think is the right thing, you've made a judgement on my character. But the world is made up of gazillions of different people and opinions of which yours and mine is but two. We will have to agree to disagree methinks!

N B said...

:-) Okay one last comment from my end as well..... Err.... I don't make judgements about people i haven't met or even known. I don't think i'm that stupid. I form opinions after i get to know them. But yes, i tend to come to conclusions based on blogs, coz blogs sometimes reflect one's character. Again, in all fairness, i admit i may be wrong. A silly blog shouldn't necessarily mean a loser of a blogger behind it. So i'm NON-JUDGEMENTAL about you. And yes, Lets agree to disagree...... PEACE and good day :-)

Anonymous said...

"A silly blog shouldn't necessarily mean a loser of a blogger behind it"

NB, U R very wicked 2 say d least :P

Anonymous said...

"A silly blog" and "a loser of a blogger behind it"??? That describes you perfectly Mr. Bawa! It does! :P

Jerry said...

People who meet up? Who?
:O

Never heard of it!

Also, stop replying to the handicap kid, he's just trying to poke you into anger.

Scrumps said...

Jerry: You're the prime suspect! :-P